Can a man and a woman be friends without having any other intentions? This is a very good question as most of you reading this is probably in a friendship with one of a different gender. Well, I am certain many of you would answer this question rather casually by saying “YES of course” and probably wouldn't even give the question a second thought. However, if you had answered YES, then my next question is ...Why is that you would think twice or choose not to go at all, when the same guy that you thought to be a friend asks you to accompany him alone to the cinemas ???
Well, to me I feel that friendship is a word given to describe a special relationship which was formed solely by trust. One was never born into a friendship nor was asked to promise to keep a friendship. This relationship governs feelings such as togetherness, care, and most importantly trust. Being aware of the meaning of friendship, why is that people still give the above cinema question a second thought or rejection. In order to answer this question, we have to first look at the bigger picture ... the SOCIETY itself.
Today, the society we live in has miraculously evolved to a state that it leaves a huge confusion on the right and wrong doings of people living in it. What used to be wrong those days seems to be casually accepted today. For instance, if a girl and a guy those days would have held hands in front of their parents, this action would be seen as being disrespectful. However, today the same couple can even kiss in front of their parents and no one will say a thing about it. Though this extensive changes took place during the modernization of the society, there are still some urban perceptions which are still maintained especially when it comes to the relationship between a man and a woman. The truth is the society has always been the boundary to all that chooses to live within it. If a girl is to be seen together with a guy in the cinemas alone, the society which is the people around them would immediately brand them as being couples. Hence, afraid of being branded, people tend not to visit places of such alone but rather would visit them with a group of friends instead. However, the feeling of watching the movie with a huge group of friends will never be the same as watching the movie with her alone. Hence, the society is the first reason why a girl and a guy can't just be friends as their entire actions are bounded by the society.
Well I feel that the society shouldn't take the full blame for not allowing a girl and a guy to maintain a friendship. I believe that all problems arise because of one's attachments or expectations. It is so common that having known a friend for a very long time and afraid of losing him or her, one tries to take their friendship up another level into love. The ultimate truth is that no human being can live life alone. Hence it is one's natural instincts that get them attach or urge them to find a partner. This insecure feeling was never call upon; hence you can't blame the friend that chooses to love for betraying the trust of friendship. In fact, I myself would prefer marrying a girl who is priory my friend because of the many advantages; such as being able to understand each other better. Nevertheless, having this insecure feeling yet again dampens the hope of maintaining a friendship between a guy and a girl.
Well it is not wrong to fall in love nor is it not wrong to continue being friends. However, one should understand that we can't fall in love with all our opposite sex friends....yikes that will be crazy ...hence this proves that being friends with the opposite sex is not impossible but it is just heavily bounded. At the same time, if love is felt for a particular friend, one should not destroy the love in the name of friendship, as many true love had always originated from a true friendship.
Friendship will remain uncertain until it meets love……
Well, to me I feel that friendship is a word given to describe a special relationship which was formed solely by trust. One was never born into a friendship nor was asked to promise to keep a friendship. This relationship governs feelings such as togetherness, care, and most importantly trust. Being aware of the meaning of friendship, why is that people still give the above cinema question a second thought or rejection. In order to answer this question, we have to first look at the bigger picture ... the SOCIETY itself.
Today, the society we live in has miraculously evolved to a state that it leaves a huge confusion on the right and wrong doings of people living in it. What used to be wrong those days seems to be casually accepted today. For instance, if a girl and a guy those days would have held hands in front of their parents, this action would be seen as being disrespectful. However, today the same couple can even kiss in front of their parents and no one will say a thing about it. Though this extensive changes took place during the modernization of the society, there are still some urban perceptions which are still maintained especially when it comes to the relationship between a man and a woman. The truth is the society has always been the boundary to all that chooses to live within it. If a girl is to be seen together with a guy in the cinemas alone, the society which is the people around them would immediately brand them as being couples. Hence, afraid of being branded, people tend not to visit places of such alone but rather would visit them with a group of friends instead. However, the feeling of watching the movie with a huge group of friends will never be the same as watching the movie with her alone. Hence, the society is the first reason why a girl and a guy can't just be friends as their entire actions are bounded by the society.
Well I feel that the society shouldn't take the full blame for not allowing a girl and a guy to maintain a friendship. I believe that all problems arise because of one's attachments or expectations. It is so common that having known a friend for a very long time and afraid of losing him or her, one tries to take their friendship up another level into love. The ultimate truth is that no human being can live life alone. Hence it is one's natural instincts that get them attach or urge them to find a partner. This insecure feeling was never call upon; hence you can't blame the friend that chooses to love for betraying the trust of friendship. In fact, I myself would prefer marrying a girl who is priory my friend because of the many advantages; such as being able to understand each other better. Nevertheless, having this insecure feeling yet again dampens the hope of maintaining a friendship between a guy and a girl.
Well it is not wrong to fall in love nor is it not wrong to continue being friends. However, one should understand that we can't fall in love with all our opposite sex friends....yikes that will be crazy ...hence this proves that being friends with the opposite sex is not impossible but it is just heavily bounded. At the same time, if love is felt for a particular friend, one should not destroy the love in the name of friendship, as many true love had always originated from a true friendship.
Friendship will remain uncertain until it meets love……
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1 comment:
Good post.
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